Friday, March 19, 2010

simple memory game/ what to do with a worrier

"mum sometimes before lunch, my heart beats too fast and I dont know what to do"

My little worrier in her parade today, you can see the pain in the bum kid behind her annoying her star... :(

My beautiful big girl is a worrier ( unfortunately exactly like her mum) and has had some trouble in negotiating the playground.. its a bit deeper than that but I will watch what I say cos you never know whos reading this....

She told me she has a little panic, a little cry and then shes ok. And it kills me. Slowly, achingly, and sometimes more painful than I know what to do with. 'I'll homeschool her' I would love to think, but really, I dont have the brain to stretch her past probably kindergarten. And she needs to learn her place in the world without me, as horrible and hard as that is.
And so this morning it starts.. " I feel sick", "I'm nervous" as we prepare for the Nursery Rhyme Parade at school today. She wants to be in it, she loves her star, but internally shes not sure how it will go and that freaks her out. This week shes been teary all week (end of term blues, shes ready for a break!) and today I have been calm tried to talk to her about other things to taker her mind of it. Arriving at school shes fine, all the way up until the damn star starts misbehaving and I can see in her face shes panicking. I try hard not to panic for her too, willing her to be ok. A few tears, she walks the catwalk hidden between two friends. Finished, a few more tears, settles quickly and gets on with her day.
her cute class, again the child is playing with her star points

Fine out of the limelight

Hidden, face down its all I can do to not pull her off the stage and hold her

We talked alot yesterday about what to do if she feels worried. But really, I could give her a thousand examples of myself but shes not really listening. So i found this little gem at the library.

Its a great story about a little guy who meets a worrier who "worrys" him, whispering horrible things to him at night time to make him worried. And each day the things he worried about turn out to be not much at all. And so we read it tonight ( twice in fact!) and I could see the cogs tick over. Its going to take time and love for this little one to learn how to deal with it, but finding books like this will help :)

Today, after the emotion of this morning ( ok so maybe I am over exaggerating but I was beat!) I came home and set up a simple memory game with Jared. I've wanted to do this for ages with him, but hes never really been keen. But I changed it to make it irristable :)

The game is " Whats missing?" and its something I have played with kids in my care for years. I started at 2 with Jumeirah and she loves it.

You need about 5-10 items ( depending on your childs age) and a tea towel. Pick items your child knows the name of, things they see everyday. Normally I pick a fork, a toothbrush, a comb, a torch etc

For Jared, we had 7 of his Thomas trains. Very quickly I figured that 7 was too many to start with so I dropped it to 4 trains. Name each item with your child saying it too.

Terence, Duncan, Diesel and Thomas

Then get them to close their eyes and cover the items with a tea towel. secretly take an item away. Get them to open their eyes and tell you whats missing.Get stupidly excited when they get it right ( works for me :) )

It took him a few gos to work out that one was missing but then he had the hang of it and really enjoyed it. Will play again next week with a few more trains and maybe even some other things around the house. Amahli sat and watched and got very excited when we shouted that he got it right!

Until she thieves them all and runs away screaming in delight....

The chase is on :)


  1. Charley (my 18 month) does that stealing and running down the hall as she squeals and screams. She is so happy about snatching the goods, and so excited about the battle to come. She waits for her brother to chase her.

    My son sounds a lot like Jumeirah. We have bully issues with specific children. He gets nervous in crowds, and I would very much love to homeschool him to protect him, but doing it for that reason will only make things worse. Cole needs to be in a social setting and learn. He has already progressed so well in preschool. So I understand...completely.

  2. Have you also read the book "Wemberly Worried" by Kevin Henkes? Excellent book, especially for this age. It breaks your heart, doesn't it?

  3. oh i havent seen that book! will have a look for it thanks :) yeah its really killing me :(

  4. thanks kim :) for the understanding.... being a mum is really hard on the emotions!! we have holidays here in 9 more school days so i cant wait :)